Croning Ceremony to celebrate 60th birthdays
The bat-shit-crazy joy of Croning Ceremonies
Crone Ann Blackburn shares the joy of her experience of 'Croning Ceremonies' (also known as 'Crone Crowning Ceremonies').
Rites of passage
By Crone Ann Blackburn
It’s 2019. I’m 59 and thinking a LOT about turning 60. It feels momentous, but there’s no ‘coming of age’, no prom or bar mitzvah for us oldies. Or is there?
My friend (and celebrant) Amanda Zaninetti, has an interesting proposal; how do I feel about a ‘Croning Ceremony’? We get a bunch of my friends together, Amanda holds the space, and we properly celebrate my entry into cronehood.
It’s a big fat yes from me.
There are secretive meetings with Amanda and close friends. Then, on a Saturday in September, I’m brought into my own living room to be greeted by nine women in cloaks ululating at my arrival.
What follows is a personal, loving, hilarious and serious acknowledgement of a transition into something new.
Amanda shares the historical significance of the crone, I complete quests and there are gentle pointers for the years to come from people who know me.
As the ritual reaches its climax, I squeeze through a child’s play tunnel for my ‘rebirthing’ before I’m crowned and friends share memories and present gifts.
I am seriously thinking this could be the best night of my life.
Almost five years later, we’ve had two more Cronings - the second for Julie and the most recent for Andrea (Amanda’s partner).
Seven of us plot for weeks before Andrea’s event in May 2024, thrashing out five tasks or ‘quests’ between us, each linked to Andrea’s life and personality.
We’re allotted jobs to make sure the event runs smoothly. I need to make a piñata filled with sweets, sort out a crone tee-shirt (thank you twistedtwee!), design a ‘Wanted for rimes against the patriarchy’ poster, adapt the words to ‘Caravan of Love’ for Andrea’s rebirthing (‘Cronivan of Love’, anyone?) and think about a gift (symbolic and/or conventional).
Wanted for crimes against the patriarchy.
I’m also organising Andrea’s first quest, a round of physical tasks. Linked to her competitiveness and strength, she’ll complete a timed plank and electric chair, run up the street with the added challenge of a running resistance band and crack open the piñata with a rolling pin.
There are four more quests and after each we’ll add badges to the ‘crone crown’ for the crowning at the end. Then there’s a sharing of memories and gifts. Here’s mine.
The evening is everything we wished for - riotous, affectionate, chaotic, funny and joyful. We round it off with a home-cooked Middle Eastern feast and lashings of Prosecco.
This is what Andrea says about her croning:
“I honesty felt this was one of the best nights of my life. It was SO much fun and there was so much laughter. I felt truly seen by my friends, fully known and genuinely loved. It made me excited to be entering my 60th year and blessed and privileged to be part of the cronedom.”
Three Cronings in and I’m a full-blown convert. Here’s why:
As we age, there should be more celebration, not less; after all it’s a privilege to still be in the world and time is running out!
We need to rail against a culture that devalues older women. Let’s celebrate our beautiful selves, reclaim our space and feel positive about the journey.
As someone who’s been Croned, there are few times when I’ve felt so roundly loved. On the other side, being involved in a croning allows proper reflection on a relationship and a chance to express your love and respect - as well as an opportunity to enjoy the delicious community and power of older women.
Croning can be as complex or simple as you want. There are no rules. Do it when you’re 50, 60, 70, 80, 63, do it retrospectively when you hit a hundred. Do it tomorrow, next week, next month, next year. Do it in nature. Do it in your living room. Do it on retreat. Do it for a friend. Demand a croning for yourself. Make it up and make it fun!
Big thanks to Amanda Zaninetti who came up with the idea for our Cronings, held the space and corralled the wild cats for mine and Andrea’s ceremonies. If you want a celebrant to help you with a Croning Ceremony, she’s on 07939 830096.
More links and tings
🫵🏽 Anyone in PR? We’d LOVE to spread the word about Cronings as a helpful ritual to view female ageing in a more positive and hopeful way - a celebration of sisterhood, but also a sacred pause, to think and reflect on what we might aspire to in our ‘third act’. So if you are in PR or know someone who is (especially if you have connections to Women’s Hour etc), let us know. As you can see, we’ve got some ruddy great case studies to share!
🏔 Here’s where I had my Crone Crowning at Crone-in-Training Steph’s place in Bodlondeb, Corwen, North Wales. It sleeps up to 12 in three rooms and has a fabulous studio space for doing the serious shiz. She’s pretty booked up running retreats, so your best bet is booking for January which would be a rather magical time to do one.
✂️ One of our Creative Crones - Crone Kazza of Kettle of Fish ran my crown and lantern making workshop. She’s great to book for events and retreats too.
🫵🏽 Have you had or been to a Croning Ceremony? We’d love to hear your experiences! Please share below! 👇🏽
😲 Interested in running a Croning Ceremony for yourself or a friend?
We’re working with Ann and Amanda to pull together a ‘Crone Crowning Toolkit’ for paid subscribers - leave a comment below if you want notifying when it’s ready!
Crone Crowning and Croning Ceremony High Priestess / facilitator
Amanda Zaninetti who created and led Ann’s and Andrea’s ceremonies is available for croning ceremonies and you can get her on 07939 830096.